Someone told me recently that my blogs are getting longer. I took it as a positive. It meant someone was reading them. Once my vacation starts in July, I’ll have more time to write. That same person said last week’s blog was the longest ever. I took that as a challenge.
This morning, I want to talk about the
rules that govern the game of golf. While many are universal, not all apply on
Men’s Night.
For example, etiquette experts stress
that the golfer farthest from the hole plays first—unless everyone agrees to
play “ready golf,” as we do on Men’s Night. The only time you’ll get heck is if
you don’t let the guy who just birdied go next.
Collared shirts are standard, even
required, at most courses. At our local course, you wear what you want. In
Shoal Lake, jeans are fairly common, especially on cooler evenings at the start
or end of the season. On the hottest days, some guys even go shirtless. This
usually involves high levels of both UV and intoxication.
You’re also not supposed to hit
someone else’s ball, but it happens on Men’s Night. When it does, the offender
incurs a two-stroke penalty and must replay their own ball.
Some courses have internal
out-of-bounds areas marked by white stakes. Shoal Lake does not. This was
helpful to Jason Gorrell last night when he landed on the putting green from
the second tee box. Impressively, he made par from his lie 155 yards directly
south of the hole over some dense bush.
Official golf rules require you to play the ball as it lies, even if it’s in a divot, on hardpan, or in a less-than-perfect lie. At Shoal Lake, we use a version of “winter rules,” allowing preferred lies on your own fairway only. You can move your ball within six inches, or a club length, but no closer to the hole. This rule doesn’t apply to balls in the rough or on another fairway. If you’re fluffing your ball in the rough, stop it. The rough is meant to be harder to hit from than the fairways.
There’s also the expectation that you
stay quiet during swings. Phones should be off, and voices low. That said, we
have lots of guys on call, such as Hydro workers and those from implement
dealerships, who may need to keep their phones on. If your phone rings
mid-swing and it’s work or the contractor building your new house, that’s
generally acceptable. If it’s your spouse, you should immediately pick up your
ball and go home. It’s family time now.
One unofficial rule of Men’s Night is
no sharing feelings. It’s never been officially stated but it applies in my
group. If you are mad about a shot, no problem. If you are struggling with an
ongoing sadness or malaise due to challenges of life, put on a brave face. Golf
isn’t a therapy session. As far as I know, none of us are trained counsellors.
On Wednesday evenings, swearing is permitted, but only if it’s creative and directed at inanimate objects. And while dropping an F-bomb after a bad shot might feel cathartic, don’t throw clubs. You could hurt someone or break a light on their cart. That happened to me. I won’t say who did it but it occurred at the Horse Race a few years back.
Also, like all courses it is important
to fix ball marks on the green, avoid walking on someone’s putting line, and
make sure your garbage finds a receptacle. I am noting the last one due to
recent experience. While on an early morning scavenger hunt this week to find
lost balls, I found cans in the bushes near four different holes. One was about
50 feet from the tree line. I guess if someone was looking that far in, they
deserve to be drinking.
Another local rule is the Men’s Night
max, referenced last week. If you’re in the trees and playing your seventh
shot, it’s time to pick up. We’re here to play golf, not conduct an
archaeological dig.
Break the rules and you might get a
reminder or an unfriendly stare. But if it involves cheating, expect harsher
penalties. Public shunning is not out of the question.
I expect that the majority of golfers
generally respected the rules of golf last night, to the best of their ability.
Perhaps a few people slightly improved their lie off the fairway. Maybe there
was some noise during swings or puts, such as the backfiring of the Gator or
someone trying to finish up a story that they just started. But just like every
week, things went reasonably well and everyone seemed to have a good time.
Ron Huberdeau likely had a good night. He got closest to the pin on #9 and split a $21.25 skin with Scott Maynes on #1. Scott's teeshot on that hole was in the middle of the bush on the right but bounced almost back to the fairway.
The other closest to the pin went to Darren Ostash on #5.
Another skin went to Ryden Lanouette
and James Van De Velde on #7. They earned $63.75 thanks to Ryden’s eagle and
James’ par.
Here is one interesting thing from last
night. For the 34 golfers, the middle score was 46. That was as high as I can
remember it. I suspect the gusting winds earlier in the round played a factor.
Okay, that was a longer blog entry
than normal. If your read the whole thing, I appreciate your patience. If you didn't make it to the end, there is nothing I can say to help because you are no longer reading this.