Yes...it was a cool one!

Okay…so I am not a meteorologist.  I will admit that my initial projections for the weather missed a little bit. When we started golfing it was 1 C with a wind chill of -4 C.  When we finished at 8:30 pm it was -1 C with a wind chill of -7 C.  There were toques and mitts, and long underwear.  There was shivering and blue lips and restricted swings because of multiple layers of clothing.  Golfers were adding two or three clubs because of the impact of the cold on their balls.  They were also not going to the bathroom outside…for the same reason. With the less than ideal temperatures, no one broke forty, but someone broke 60…the wrong side of 60 I mean.

How cold was it?  Well, on #3 I broke a ball on my tee shot…cracking it all the way around.  Lots of guys talked about the stingers that they received when they hit long irons. It was so cold that Robin suggested we implement a ten and ten rule in the future…that being a minimum of ten golfers and 10 Celsius.  It was so cold that two guys used a dog sled instead of a golf cart. It was so cold that when Brad got home he gave Diane the cold shoulder for a change.  It was so cold that Milt stayed home in fear that hair his might freeze.  It was so cold that the chicken wings in the Club House were only available in hot.  It was so cold that you could putt out of the water hazards. It was so cold that Wes argued with Butch just for the chance to get into a heated argument. It was so cold that when someone made a great shot in your group, you gave them the mitten instead of the finger. It was so cold we huddled around Neuf, just for the hot air.  It was so cold that everyone had the putting yips because of the shivering.  It was so cold that when Austin Hunter tried to spit on his club to clean it, the spit froze in mid air. 

If the temperature is low on some future Mens’ Night, check out the following link for some cold weather golf tips: http://www.intothegrain.com/ten-cold-weather-golf-tips/

One other suggestion…while they call them “hand warmers”, they are good no matter on which body part you use them.

Something else interesting that I discovered.  Golf balls are designed to perform optimally at the industry benchmark 80 degrees Fahrenheit (27 Celsius), not the cold temperatures that we experienced on Wednesday.  They actually make special low compression cold weather balls (http://coldfusiongolf.com/).

Sixteen golfers said the heck with the cold and came out for the first Mens’ Night for the year.  Skins were won on three holes.  Keith Booth and Stephen David (that’s me) cashed in for $34 hole #2. The separated-at-birth twosome of Robin and Neuf won a total of $54 for scoring best on consecutive holes (#3 and 4). The deuce pot fell to Mike McLennan who used a 3 iron and a putter to eagle the par 4 first hole. Closest to the hole winners were Brad Benton on #5 and Blake Cramer on #9.

Looking forward to next week, I am not going to try and predict the weather…but I am hopeful our numbers will continue to grow.  Come for the golf, the chance to hang out with your buddies, and maybe some hockey or cards afterward.  Plus we have two hole in one pots, one capped at $1616 and the other growing to $581 as of last week.

Mens' Night begins April 25th

Last year we had nineteen Mens' Nights after a June 1st start. With our opening night next Wednesday, April 25^th, we have six extra nights at our disposal. I even did a double take when I checked the calendar. There are actually five Wednesdays in May.

The weather forecast definitely looks promising for next week with a sunny day in the mid teens being projected. The golf forecast looks equally promising. If you think about it, it's like the first day of school...but for middle aged men.  Like many others, I will likely be too excited the night before to get any sleep.  Then the next day, instead of moms dropping off Kindergarten children, wives and girlfriends will drop off their charges for Mens’ Night...wishing them luck and telling them to try their best.  Like elementary students, we will show up with our new bags, albeit golf bags instead of knapsacks. Some of us will have new shoes and new golf clothes. Everyone will be filled with promise, whether it is because of new swing thoughts or new equipment or shiny new balls.  There will be smiles and good natured exchanges as people congregate together after a few months apart.

Unlike grade school, there will those aspects that appeal to the older crowd.  For example, there will be alcoholic beverages and gambling.  There will be some partial nudity and the occasional hooker…but mainly slicers.  Speaking of the partial nudity, can we do something about those guys that play topless on the hottest evenings.  It is Mens’ Night for god sakes!

Unfortunately, like the school experience of children, the promise of Mens' Night is not realized for everyone.  While there will be excitement for many, some golfers may have anxiety about either not being successful or doing something that might be embarrassing. Some of the promise will disappear quickly when the sound of balls leaving clubs is followed by the sounds of balls striking trees and grown men muttering mean-spirited profanities.  While some will experience promising beginnings, others will soon realize that this year could be worse than the last one.  Like small children, there may be some lying (“I had a seven”) and some temper tantrums (“How come no one gave me that?).  Some will throw things…most likely drivers off the eight tee. Some will be oppositional to their teacher, such as when that know-it-all in your foursome starts telling you what you are doing wrong and how you should correct it. The popular kids (John Gill, Blake Hunter) will be envied by the nerdy kids (Neuf, Ronnie Susinski, myself). There may be occasional instances of teasing and bullying (leave Milt alone Kimpinski!).  There will be boys who flirt with girls…which is cute when you are in Grade 3, but somewhat creepy when it is a 45 year old guy hitting on a 20 year old cart girl.  For those of you such as Brad who likes a woman closer to his age, I can report the return of a certain club house lady from a few years back.

In terms of the golf, the format remains much the same.  We will do a shotgun start and then play 9 holes with skins.  The maximum hole score of +3 will be sustained to speed up play and minimize low self esteem. The ringer board will continue to be flighted to allow for additional opportunities for prizes.  For those of you who weren’t members of the Golf Club last year, we are once again offering half price memberships.  This includes unlimited playing privileges on Mens’ Night.

This year, I am going to form an email group comprised of people who would like notifications of blog updates or coming events related to Mens' Night. If you would like to be included in the email group, simply let me know at sdavid@mts.net

One additional thing I would like to encourage is some interaction with the blog...and perhaps field reporting.  Feel free to add a comment to any post.  As a special incentive, anyone who posts a comment during a given week will be entered into a draw for a free beverage the subsequent Wednesday.  Remember to keep the comments tasteful and relatively kind and good natured.

See you Wednesday.  I will be the guy sitting outside the Club House waiting for it to open earlier that morning.